Following Blues From Afar – A Very Different Christmas, Blues Vs Chelsea – By Aff

January 15, 2010 by Aff · 6 Comments
Filed under: Life In Australia 

Sometimes, being an exiled Bluenose makes you feel exactly that – exiled. You tend to miss things that people at home take for granted. Banter in the street, the feeling of superiority after a derby day win, the idiotic ramblings of the TalkSPORT pundits, the genius of Jeff Stelling’s over dramatising Liverpool’s demise. Sure, it’s easy to follow things like this these days with the wonders of modern technology but most people aren’t at their best at 3 AM in the morning and Jeff Stelling – as good as he is – just doesn’t cut the homesick blues when you’re pining to be at St Andrews, and in Birmingham itself.

With that being said, there’s also a sadistic satisfaction to following Blues from Australia. I proudly announce to people that I haven’t missed a Blues game since I arrived in October 2008 and from a sports-mad country like Australia, I still get raised eyebrows and a look that says “We really can’t compete with you ’soccer’ fans.” People here, no matter what they may tell you, do not love sport as much as English football fans love their clubs. Part of this satisfaction came over the Christmas period for me. I felt as though I’d done my duty as a Blues fan and could justifiably claim to be as involved in the club as anyone who had been sitting in the Tilton against Chelsea on Boxing Day.

My story starts many weeks before Christmas when it was decided that for a week after Christmas, I would be visiting Melbourne with Mrs Aff and Mr & Mrs In-Law Aff. We’ve regularly been on roadtrips together over the years and Melbourne is a city that I don’t know much about and yet every Pom I’d ever come across in Aus says that it’s the most English of all the Australian cities. I was itching to visit. The problem was that during my time away (Boxing Day to 3rd January) Blues would be playing twice. Naturally both games would be live on Fox Sports but on the night of the Chelsea game, I would be staying in a motel in Bairnsdale. Wireless internet was not on the menu according to the website and so I’d have to scout around trying to find a pub or club showing the game or manage to scam some internet from someone, somewhere. The second game was versus Stoke and I was pretty sure I’d be okay for that since I’d be staying with family in Melbourne – no issue.

Boxing Day came and I had scouted around on the internet for WiFi hotspots in and around Bairnsdale (pop. 11,282.) McDonalds have 24 hour free WiFi in this country and I considered going to park the car in the car park and just leech coverage – at least radio coverage if not streaming video. However, my laptop is quite old and the battery lasts half an hour tops so unless I could find an in car charger, I was stuffed on that score. I’d scout round local shops once I got there. On Boxing Day morning, I glumly set about making sure I had everything I needed – camera, check, laptop, check, books to read, check, wallet, check, keys, check, phone, check. Everything else, Mrs Aff is responsible for because I’m the type of guy that would make sure I had 14 t-shirts but would forget to pack socks.

As I set about my extensive list of essentials, Mrs Aff had an idea. A rather ingenius lightbulb idea too, so it was.

“Why don’t you take a dial up cable with you? Our internet account has a back up dial account and you can dial out from the motel at a local rate and just stream the commentary of the game?” I gave her one of those looks that said “If you were a puppy, I’d give you a chew stick. You’re very pretty,” and the trip was suddenly looking much more favourable. I had a sneaking suspicion that we’d ‘do’ Chelsea and I’d kick myself forever if we won but I hadn’t heard or seen it happen.

I was envisaging one of those ‘moments’ as a football fan. You know one of those moments that you think about in 5, 10, 15 years and describe in detail to your best mate – and people who have zero interest in football – over and over again. And because your friends and family love you and realise how important it is, they react accordingly and pretend like they’ve never heard it before. I don’t know how many times Mrs Aff has relived the Stern John in the last minute at VP story. Each time, being attentive and pretending like she doesn’t know what’s coming. She’s a really good sort, in case you hadn’t noticed already. I was fearing another Stern John moment and I couldn’t stand the idea that in five years, people would talk about that game against Chelsea where Chucho skinned seven players and then curled one in from 4 million yards. I couldn’t miss that. I couldn’t say that “Ah yes, I was asleep in the middle of nowhere in Victora (I think.)” I had to be connected to it.

The trip up to Bairnsdale was lengthy. We stopped and ate, we had a look around pretty seaside towns, we went and saw Buchan Caves. All very jolly for a family roadtrip. My in-laws asked about the Chelsea game. They often ask me about Blues and keep an eye on how we’re doing. They even ring me up to tell me when Blues games are replayed on Fox Sports to make sure I haven’t missed anything. When in England, Mother-In-Law Aff used to send me Premier League previews from the local papers to give me the Aussie slant on how Blues might do. They were always much more favourable when we had Stan Lazaridis…

We arrived in Bairnsdale and after checking in, I immediately asked the receptionist about the possibility of internet usage. She stated that they had dial up but that the motel could only use one line at a time. I reassured her that at midnight-2 AM, I’m pretty sure I’d be the only one interested in using it! She agreed and stated that she wasn’t sure what the charge for the internet would be. She wasn’t sure whether it would charge me a standard local call (probably around 50 cents – 25 of your English pence) or the much more expensive local motel call rate of 60c per thirty seconds ($108 for 90 minutes!) She said that I’d find out when I got the bill the next day. I gave her a “Are you serious? You’re serious? Do more, find out,” look. She explained that she wasn’t the owner and that the owner was away on holiday at the moment. She agreed to ring and find out for me. She rang. The owner didn’t know either. I didn’t want to risk spending over £50 to listen to a dodgy internet commentary in a game that conceivably we could get tonked in. I was… how shall we put it? Pissed off, that’s it.

So onto the next option.

“Do you know of any clubs in the area that might be showing it?”
“What time does it start?”
“11:45 PM.”
“Well, the RSL closes at midnight.”
“…”

Clearly, they didn’t own it and probably weren’t from around there. Or if they were, it’s put me right off moving there, that’s for sure. Onto option 3, in-car charger to listen to Wi-Fi at McDonalds. Time was getting on at this point. It must’ve been about 4:30 PM. We raced around town looking for electronic shops. Some were already closed (welcome to country Australia, folks!) but we found an independant place that was still open. We popped in and asked a very friendly local if she had in-car chargers for laptops. She stated that she did and showed us a selection. I spied one for $20 but wasn’t sure that it would fit my connection. I needed to check. The lady asked where we were staying. I explained that we were in a motel just around the corner. She stated that if we popped back to check, she would stay open enough time for us to return to make a decision. What a friendly, helpful person… she should really run a motel.

I raced back to the motel. I picked up my laptop. I checked. I raced back (‘raced’ being a term to indicate the gravity of the situation, at no point did I break any local traffic laws and go quicker than signs stated that I am allowed to go. Besides, I wasn’t driving,) to the shop. The $20 did not fit – but there was another one that did. It was in the $70-$100 price range. I baulked. I wasn’t going to shell out £35-40 with no guarantee that McDonalds did not switch internet off when they closed and went to drive-through only and without making sure that it would work at a speed decent enough to stream the game.

Sunk.

I went back to my motel room and sat on the edge of my bed. Thinking, thinking, thinking. I fired up my laptop and did a search for local wireless internet. Depending on where I stood / sat in the room, there was lots of networks around. Only one was unsecured. It belonged to a motel across the street. I double-clicked it to see if I could use it. I couldn’t. I needed a login and password. The wireless range was good enough – again depending on where I stood – but could I use it if I wasn’t staying there? One way to find out.

Off I trudged to Kansas City Motel across the road from where I was staying. I walked in and addressed the lady behind the counter recalling the entire story from start to finish and explained how important this game is. “And so, would I be able to purchase some internet from you even though I’m not staying here?”
The woman looked slightly confused and ever so slightly proud at the same time. She looked at me:
“Well, no-one has ever asked before. But I don’t see why not. We’re fully booked anyway so it’s not like you could stay here even if you wanted to.” And I handed her seven Australian dollars and she handed me, what I can only describe as Willy Wonka’s Golden Ticket. I clutched it tightly in my paw and – I’m not proud of this – moonwalked across the street back to my own motel. My mother-in-law saw me and there’s a photo in existence of me looking more excited than any man has a right to over a piece of paper of that size.

I booted up my laptop to make sure that I could connect. I did so. It was odd because it would only connect to certain sites. I couldn’t check the BBC but I could check bcfc.com and Joys & Sorrows. I hoped against hope that I could stream the game through a football subscription site that I am a member of. Time would tell – but for now, I had to get some shut-eye. I needed a couple of hours worth of sleep before the game kicked off in order to be able to function the next day – day 2 of the road trip, Bairnsdale to Melbourne including a three hour coastal walk along the cliffs at Kilcunda.

11 PM came and I wasn’t asleep. After a big family dispute about the longest river in Australia and where it starts, we ended up doing the Melbourne Herald Sun’s quiz. We didn’t do very well and eventually, I decided that 45 minutes sleep wasn’t going to make much difference so I did what I always do when I’m waiting for Blues to kick off – I walked up and down the room stressing. The accommodation was pretty basic with one bedroom locked away from an open-plan kitchen, living room, second bedroom kinda deal. Mrs Aff and I took the open plan since I’d be watching Blues in the ‘kitchen’ whilst the in-laws took the private bedroom – mainly because I couldn’t get wireless connectivity in there!

15 minutes before kick off and I booted up the laptop. I connected. It fluctuated between 0-60% connectivity. I held the laptop up. I placed it on the floor. I sat with it on my lap. I put it on the table. I opened the door. I opened a window. I opened the curtains. I moved furniture. Still, it wouldn’t connect to the stream. Several under-breath profanities later, it connected briefly. 10 minutes had already gone and I feared I’d missed the Chucho wonder-goal where he beat 19 players and curled it in from 9 million yards. Not so.

I worked out that balancing the laptop on top of the TV in front of the window gave me 60% connectivity and the speed tended to vault up and down between 1.5mb and 6mb. This was good enough and I settled (stood) up to watch the game. I stood a few inches in front of my laptop with one paw holding it at all times to make sure that it didn’t fall (although mainly because I didn’t want to risk losing connectivity and somehow, my hand on it meant that my body was some sort of wireless receiver, I didn’t want to stop that… y’know, just in case.) I stood like this for nearly two hours, watching as we took on the very best – and didn’t come off second best.

Chucho’s ‘goal’ (from 3 yards, not nine million) sort of caught me unawares and there may have been celebrating, whooping (whisper-whoop as I’d now like to Christen it,) pumping of fist and running round in mini-circles before I realised that it had been disallowed. Thankfully, the laptop stayed fairly steady on top of the TV and the wireless receiver running around in circles like a child at a birthday party did not break a really good quality stream.

At the end of the game, I was exhausted. Slightly disappointed too since Chucho’s goal really should’ve stood and we could and should have been 1 up. Maybe that would’ve spurred Chelsea on but in the circumstances, a point was a good point and it kept the unbeaten run going. I didn’t miss any of those moments that you talk about in 10, 15 years although I daresay that I’ll be recounting this story many times. People have already asked about it and again, more shakes of the head and raising of eyebrows as I recount various aspects of it.

When you go through stuff like this, it makes you realise that whether you’ve forked out £400 for a season ticket, go when you can afford to, let Blues ruin or make your weekend or whether you just get up at 3 AM in the morning to watch a pixelated internet stream, we’re all part of one club and you do what you can when you can to prove this. During this trip, I really felt like I did my part and at the end of the game, I stood and applauded the blue pixels off the screen like I was there. I felt like Roger Johnson was applauding me back at full time and in that moment, I realised that being exiled doesn’t mean being excluded, it just means that I get to show my commitment in a whole other sort of way.

Part two coming soon, Blues away at Stoke…

You can follow me on twitter – http://twitter.com/affbcfc

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Liverpool 2-2 Birmingham City – A View From Down Under

November 10, 2009 by Aff · Leave a Comment
Filed under: Life In Australia 

I know it may sound childish but each time I type ‘View From Down Under’, I have a small chuckle to myself. I’m quite childish. But in the same way that infantile humour makes me giggle, the idea of watching Blues makes me excited. I’m very easily excited, especially considering some of the stuff that I’ve seen us play in the past – and then still been excited about us the weekend after. I mean, the Liverpool home defeat in the 1/4 final of the FA Cup, for example. It still brings me out in a cold sweat just thinking about it but the following weekend, I was still excited about the prospect of Blues playing (don’t bother looking it up, we were beaten 3-0 by Chelsea!)

And following on from the win against Sunderland and the good performance against Manchester City, I was very excited about our game today. I genuinely gave us a chance of winning. We were never going to be favourites and any other result but a home win would still have been viewed as a bit of an eyebrow raiser. Still, we have a good record against Liverpool in the Premier League and with Liverpool going through a bad run and also missing key players, a good result was on.

The game was to be screened live here (as most games are) but it was to kick off at 7 AM. Seven AM is not a problem for me. I can wake up at pretty much any time of the day or night and I’m yet to miss a Blues game since I arrived in October 2008 so being up and awake at daft hours is sort of second nature by now. Not that 7 AM is strange, really. It’s actually pretty good, being able to watch live football before work.

Ah, yes, work.

This game was not like the Manchester City game. I could not book the day off. One of my colleagues had selfishly booked this week off meaning that in a company that has exactly three employees, gaining a day off on the same day as a colleague was always going to be difficult impossible. So it was decided that I would get up at around 6:30 AM, get ready for work, watch the first half and the first twenty minutes of the second half and then high tail it to work to be ready for an 8:30 AM start where I would listen to the rest of the game via Blues Player.

Best laid plans…

The phone goes around 7:15 AM (or as I like to call it “For f**k’s sake o’clock” – we’d just gone 1-0 down) and Mrs Aff suddenly needs a lift to her mother’s house before I have to go to work. So I decide that I would watch the first half, deliver Mrs Aff to her location and then watch about 10-15 minutes of the second half at my mother-in-law’s house who lives quite near my place of work. My mother-in-law / Mrs Aff combo was due to look after my twin nephews for the day and so when I arrived at said house just after the second half had kicked off, they were not amused when I switched off The Wiggles to watch Blues… although the indoctrination has already begun with said twins already owning a home and away Blues kit between them. One of them has also learnt how to yell ‘Chucho!’ too.

But that is fast forwarding a little bit. Let me go back to “For f**k’s sake o’clock”. Feeling glum with the way we had started, I decide that I would have a bit of a post. I go fishing and blame Joe Hart for the goal on the J & S forum. Unfortunately, no fishes were biting today so I settled back down and focussed 100% on the game. Ridge isn’t a left back, we’re really missing Ferguson, Chucho appears to be too lightweight and needs to learn to stick up for himself. McFadden’s injured. McLeish doesn’t take him off. Next thing I know, we’ve gone and equalised…

Apparently, Blues scoring is dangerous and excessive jumping in a rental property that is somewhat less than sturdy can cause damage. I am warned that if I must jump around and scream like a girl when Blues score, I must stand next to the TV unit in order to catch the TV if it falls. It supposedly, ‘wobbled’. I can’t say I noticed.

I join in with the wonderful rendition of KRO that is booming through my speakers as Mrs Aff kindly fetches me my work clothes so that I don’t have to move from in front of the TV. She’s a good sort. At this point, I must point out that I was not naked whilst watching Blues. That would be weird. I was wearing a very manly dressing gown.

It’s already quite warm, I open the door to the deck and let the neighbours hear that there is a cat being bludgeoned to death with some sort of blunt object in my house. In fact, it was just Liam Ridgewell deciding that he was bored of defending so he thought he’d help the Liverpool attackers by heading the ball across the Blues penalty area (had he REALLY wanted to help, he could’ve just pretended to tackle a Liverpool striker) and then Chucho blazes wide from a tight angle and I can’t help but let out an expletive and stamp my foot like a petulant child (or Steven Gerrard when things aren’t going his way.)

Mother-in-law’s house is about 10-15 minutes drive away so I decide that, as soon as the half time whistle goes, I’ll brush my teeth (last thing I do before leaving the house) and then immediately get gone. I stand half in the living room and half in the laundry. I decide that I really want to see the beginning of the second half so I decide that it looks as though there’ll be no more action in the first half and decide to brush my teeth early. Just as I put my man-sized helping of toothpaste on my red toothbrush (did you know that they don’t have Aquafresh in Australia?) I hear Mrs Aff make a funny noise and then half yells and half confuses ‘Aff… errr…. Afffffffff!’

I walk in to see Cameron Jerome doing a full length dive in front of the Blues fans and the scoreline change in the top left hand corner. Mrs Aff describes the action “It just sort of bobbled into the net. It didn’t look like he meant it, really.” (I’ve just explained to Mrs Aff what happened this morning and she swears that she never used the term ‘bobbled’. She did. Believe me.) I watch the rather crappy replay and revel in the dissatisfaction in the voices of the commentators. I didn’t jump this time, I didn’t have to save the TV. Instead, I try and brush my teeth whilst singing KRO. I spit all over the place and decide that it’s worth it.

The journey to mother-in-law’s house is a good one. The sun is shining, the sea looks spectacular and AC/DC randomize on my car stereo. I (badly) change the lyrics to celebrate our half time status and revel in the delight of Liverpool’s misery. I laugh about the idea of Fox Sports FC on Fox Sports tonight. Last week, they claimed that Manchester City had been involved in an “embarrassing draw with Birmingham City.” What would they make of this?! I crow and sing about how today could not be ruined and how everything appeared to be just a bit brighter and nicer than usual. Even the feckwit in front of me going 40 KPH in a sixty zone was not bothering me… Swell.

I arrive at mother-in-law’s house and turn The Wiggles off. The twins immediately turn into hobgoblins of death as opposed to angelic beings as Anthony and his multi-coloured friends disappear. They climb over me and then turn their attentions to each other. One boots the other in the face (and amazingly, the bootee doesn’t go down claiming a penalty like he’d been shot, in fact, he doesn’t even cry) and so I pretend that I care more about them than I do about Blues and try to separate them. I move the bootee away from the booted and in doing so, I accidentally bang his head on the floor (there was contact, I didn’t get the ball but still, the kid did not appeal for a penalty) and he starts balling his eyes out. Sod him.

I leave him and return to the game. I watch for the next ten minutes and then craftily confess that “I can’t see Liverpool scoring a goal here, y’know!” before I run around touching walls. I’m not crazy, my mother-in-law’s house is made of wood and so it made perfect sense. Well, at the time. Now I think about it and I’m a little bit embarrassed, especially considering the quality of Liverpool’s equaliser. They were clearly going to score a Jerome-esque effort to bring it level and I was foolish to write off a top 8 side.

It appears that I’m having quite a few sly digs at Liverpool here. It’s not really Liverpool that I’m feeling aggrieved by, really. It’s the whole footballing system and the type of people in the game today. I could go on a five hour rant about such things but I’ll save you that… let’s just say that honesty, class and honour left the game long ago and it’s few and far between that we get genuine class in the game any longer. We’d all like to pretend that our club and its employees are above and beyond such actions but the sad fact of the matter is that if it had been the other way around, the majority of Blues fans would’ve been trying to justify it.

But I digress…

I climb into my car and hope that we’re still winning by the time I get there. My phone vibrates in my pocket and I withstand the urge to break the law and check the message. I swing into my favourite car parking spot and immediately check my phone… was it good news? Was it bad news? Was it someone taking the piss? “McFadden booked” reports Mrs Aff. She’s a really good sort. I text back that saying that I would bring on McSheff for McFads.

I get into the office and switch my PC on. The boss calls me into his office and insists on going through five million things before I am allowed to escape. I’ve received another text message by now. I’m dying to check it. Eventually, I leave his office and find “Liverpool penalty.” My heart sank.

The boss has already put ABC Local on the wireless and so I drown that out with commentary live from Anfield. Hearing Tom Ross in paradise is a bit disconcerting, to say the least. The game updater thing reports that it’s 2-2 and from this point on, I can only taste defeat. I listen to the rest of the game but cannot get a feel for it. Thankfully, the final whistle goes and my commentary with it.

The rest of my day was pretty uneventful in terms of this report so I’ll do an Offspring and spare you the details. I’ve watched the game in full since I arrived home and to say that it’s a disappointment would be an understatement. I can understand why Walton gave the penalty but that doesn’t mean it is one. The fact is that a Liverpool player saw a leg, jumped over it and onto the floor and cheated his team level. When you see things like this, it really does turn you off to the game. At work today, I was over the moon with a point but after seeing it on TV, it deflates you, especially considering how close the margins between staying up and relegation can be.

McLeish has called our performance “magnificent”. I’m not sure I agree with the assessment. However, it was gutsy and the type of performance that, as Blues fans, we expect. Players were willing to put themselves on the line for the cause and they showed that never say die attitude. We’ll play better this season and lose so to come away with a point at one of the top eight is encouraging.

On today’s performance, we’ve learnt just how essential Barry Ferguson is to Blues and the new brand of football that we’re trying to play, that Chucho may have a bit of a fox in the box nature about him as well as being a speed merchant (I still feel as though he needs to toughen up a bit), that Ridge cannot go on playing left back, that McFadden is never going to be a wide player, that Jerome actually can control a ball from time to time and that Joe Hart can answer his critics and play under the microscope… the world would’ve been watching him today after Taylor’s clean sheet against Manchester City.

But mostly, we’ve learnt that we have a group of players who as well as being able to play a bit, can also put in a performance of guts, guile and balls – basically, the minimum I’d say that most Blues fans expect from their side.

See you after Fulham!

You can follow me on Twitter @affbcfc

(I’ve just asked Mrs Aff to proof read this. She’s insistent that she didn’t say bobbled. I’m quite hungry. Tea’s nearly ready. Now that I think about it, I think she might’ve said ’sailed’.)

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Blues Down Under – The New Board

November 7, 2009 by Aff · 5 Comments
Filed under: Life In Australia 

Hello London, this is Sydney(ish) calling.

I’ve been in Australia for about a year now. I’m happy to report that things are going well. To quote a balding sixty-something year old New York song writer “Things are okay with me these days, I got a good job, I got a good office, I got a new wife, got a new life and the family is fine.” We’re just coming into summer and daylight savings means that I get up every morning to live football on the telly and 20-25 degrees outside. Life is sweet although watching ‘Super Sunday’ games is a bit of a hassle if it’s a good un such as Chelsea Vs Manchester United since they kick off at around 3 AM on Monday AEST. Not ideal when one is due at work at 8:30 AM. That said, Blues kicked off as that time last Sunday so I booked the day off. It would’ve been worth it had we won although missing any day off work is never necessarily bad.

Super Sunday here in Aus consists of watching North Queensland Fury against Wellington Phoenix. It doesn’t really cut the mustard, really. Still, bless ‘em, they try. And Fox Sports certainly have their own Jamie Redknapp – winner of the ‘Pundit I’d most like to hit in the face with a frying pan because he never says anything remotely interesting nor controversial but does occasionally say something really stupid’ award in the shape of Robbie Slater. And there’s Mark Bosnich, who annoys me because despite the fact that, at a relatively young age, I was taught to dislike him, actually says some mildly interesting and amusing things. And he puts Slater in his place. Which makes me happy which makes me forgive Bosnich for all of his past demeanours a little bit.

Still, it’s not really the standard of local football that I’m here to blog about. I’m finally settled in Australia now and in some sort of rhythm as far as life goes. So I decided that, with Kev’s permission, I’d start to blog about what it’s like following Blues from the other side of the planet. So from this point on, I’ll blog weekly(ish) about the goings on at St Andrew’s from an ex-pats point of view as well as sharing tidbits of what it’s like to live in Australia.

The backend of last season was a bit of a nightmare here. Blues were on TV occasionally (when they were on back home) but coverage was irregular and a half hour round up of all action from the Championship and Leagues 1 and 2 every Tuesday night did not suffice. Online coverage was sketchy too. As quickly as footage was uploaded to places like YouTube, it was erased due to copyright issues. Which I suppose is fair enough but when you’re a homesick Pom, it’s a bit of a pain. Still, promotion was achieved via a dodgy online footy stream that decided it needed to buffer every 2 minutes or so. I’m sure that those at Reading saw it in a bit more High Def than us here in Aus. Still, the result is all that matters and promotion to the Premier League meant red button access. Fox Sports show five Saturday 3 PM kick offs concurrently at 2 AM (midnight when it’s not daylight savings) so there’s a good chance that Blues will be on live here every week. Which means I’ll see more of Blues here in Australia that I could afford to in England! So far, I’ve missed just one game – Blues at home to Bolton, which was not shown here.

Oh, and Arsenal. But that wasn’t down to the selection decisions of the Fox Sport directors. That was down to my cable box blowing up literally just as the game kicked off. By the time I had tuned into the service that is Blues World, we were already 2-0 down. My other half was not amused since she’s the TV guru in our household and naturally, at 2 AM, when the cable and TV weren’t working, it was her job to fix it. She failed and eventually went back to bed in a huff. When I flipped the PC on and found us 2-0 down, she thought that I should’ve been too busy being appreciate for her efforts to fix the TV rather than focussed on how Blues were getting on. Women, eh?

And speaking of Blues World (or whatever it’s called these days) I hope one of the upgrades to the club as a result of the takeover is to ditch the jokers that run it and try and find a better way to connect with exiled fans. The service is a joke and in my experience, rarely does what it claims to do – Ie. Give exiled fans commentary. I won’t bore you with the list of mess ups throughout the years, suffice to say, it’s left me very bitter at the fact that I have no other choice but to subscribe if I want to hear Blues live when we’re not on TV. I hope that Blues World isn’t the way that Yeung, Hui, Yu, Pannu, Dunford and co are hoping to win over the 5 gazillion Chinese fans that we now have.

So as far as coverage goes, I was really looking forward to this season. And then we made the signings that we did and everyone was optimistic. We didn’t start quite as well as we’d hoped and optimism quickly turned into despair. Meanwhile, Yeung had turned up again and decided that this time, he had the funds and Sullivan and Gold were ready to play ball. Things happened very quickly and at the back end of last season, who would’ve guessed that in January, we’d have a different board with different ambitions?

What I like about the new board is that they seem to realise that football is fun. The last board – and a lot of fans across the footballing spectrum – became obssessed with winning, with success, with moving the football club on, with not getting left behind, with buying a better player, making more money. It’s a depressing thought since football has always been and should always be about having a laugh, a bit of fun, destressing from the week. It’s a little bit of a worry when the stress of football is taking over from the stress of a working week! Maybe fun isn’t the right word and perhaps I’m not painting it in the light that I wish to paint it in, like Blues are just a bit of light-hearted fun to me. That’s not true and I can’t really seem to find the correct words. Still, on we plough…

One word that is not correct is entertainment. I hate the idea that football is ‘entertainment’. WWE Wrestling is ‘entertainment’. A Keanu Reeves film is ‘entertainment’ (comedy really, but still.) A choreographed TV programme is ‘entertainment’. Football should never be choreographed or predictable or entertainment. Entertaining, sure… but somehow, that’s different. Entertainment to me is something that is designed to amuse or engage using a certain angle or coming from a certain direction. Football should be unpredictable and you should get that feeling that anything could happen when you walk through a turnstyle or sit down in front of your TV (in my case.) I still get that but it’s becoming harder to find.

And that’s why the new board seem to be such a breath of fresh air. Without jumping on the bandwagon of absolutely slating the old board – a viewpoint I generally find to be a little bit disrespectful and unappreciative on the whole – the new board seem to have realised that you need to give the fans something to be happy about. And not necessarily a 40m budget for a transfer window. And speaking of that, that worries me somewhat… what if we spend 40m and get relegated? What happens? Assume we can sell players but will they go for as much as we paid? Probably not. The old board always budgeted for relegation very well, despite what some might say.

But back to the point about the new board understanding what is required. A sense of fun and occasion, a sense of everyone working together, a sense of respect for the fans, a sense of general oveall enjoyment. I have no doubts that behind the fun-loving, getting pissed at Chinese restaurants with the fans antics lie some serious and impressive people. But coming in and immediately banging on about progress, about success, about achievements, about what the fans need to do to make it happen is not what we want. It’s not what football wants – or needs. The fun needs to be put back into the game and dare I say the word that tends to, most of the time, make me cringe when I hear it… no sod it, I’ll say it – CHARACTERS. That’s what the new board seem to be.

No-one’s saying that you can afford to run a Premier League team whilst half pissed and not focussing on what needs to be done. But there has to be scope for a bit of lively fun and clowning around. Something to brings the smiles back to the faces when the roll of the ball may not be doing so. A director grabbing a microphone (a director, I hasten to add who is not Delia Smith) and yells “I love you all!” to an astonished St Andrew’s and then goes head-to-head in a drinking competition with a local Viler and then sings KRO with the fans is exactly what we need!

Anyone remember the Barry Fry days? Compared to the days of say, Trevor Francis, they weren’t terribly successful. Yes, we won two trophies but unfortunately, we had to be relegated in the first place to do so! Bazza got rid of the youth set up and bought so many bad players and caused so many arguments that often, we found ourselves – as a third tier club – unable to get OUT of the newspapers. They were great days and people loved them because there was that sense of amusement surrounding it all. A cloud of disbelief and astonishment hung over the club because literally, you never knew what was coming next.

Then Trev took over and took us tantalisingly close to silverware and the Premier League. Some of those games under TF – the atmosphere especially – will live with some ‘noses forever. But overall, was it more fun that it was under Bazza? I’d argue that it wasn’t. Trev sort of dragged the club up towards a more professional footing and layed a lot of the groundwork for when W’or Brucey took over. But they never quite matched up to the days of Bazza being in charge, did they?

This is how I sort of feel about the new board, I think. Whilst the old board may (and it has yet to be proven) have been more professional and responsible in the way they made sure that the future of the club was never in doubt, there’s a sense of curiousness, anxiety and excitement about the new board. They could literally do anything and I always have the feeling that when I get up in the morning, I could read anything on my PC screen regarding Blues. I mean, we literally could’ve signed Ronaldo to play on the wing… but backed this up by signing the Honey Monster as cover for left back. It’s that sort of silly scenario that makes me glad that the takeover has gone ahead.

I mean, I’m sure that none of the above will happen and I’m sure that in time, we’ll see a thoroughly slick and professional outfit emerge who ARE capable of running the club to the same standard – and more – than the last board. I sincerely hope so. But I always hope that there’s this rogue element to their ownership. The type of thing that could see literally anything come from the left field and blind sight us all. The old board lost that ability and it was always middle of the road stuff with David Sullivan’s broadsides at the fans the only really thing out of the ordinary – and even after a while, they became second nature.

The now have the keys to the kingdom, let’s see what they can do with them… this expat is excited about the future. Even if the future spells financial oblivion and relegation to the third tier to play against little teams like Leeds, Charlton and Southampton!

Yours in Down-Underness…
Aff

Ps. If you do not remember me or you’d like to read some of my stuff from the olders days of J&S, you can do so here.

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Under New Management

February 4, 2009 by Aff · 1 Comment
Filed under: Blog News 

You may have noticed a severe lack of updates lately. Sorry. I know how you check daily for my ramblings and the emptiness of anything must’ve left you severely depressed, especially since you’ve probably had nothing better to do but sit at your PC since no-one in the UK can leave the house due to the six inches of snow!

I can’t relate. We’re in the middle of a ‘heatwave’ in Australia. Thankfully it’s not 42 degrees plus like it is in Melbourne and Adelaide. Here, it’s a lovely 30-35 every day. Which is great if you’re at the beach but shocking if you’re in an air conditioner-less work premesis. Which I am. Bugger.

Anyway, the point of this blog is not to tell you about the weather – as fun as that is because of the amount of whining that people from back home have been doing whenever I ring to check how everyone is – it is to tell you that it’s time for change here at Joys & Sorrows.

The lack of time due to working full time and sorting out a place to live, transport (and all my shipping just arrived from England a couple of days ago – lots and lots of boxes!) and the lack of motivation to update the place, not to mention the hassle of sorting out software updates, forum disputes and one or two other things has left me feeling like I’m probably not the best man for the job any longer.

J & S is a great site and a good idea. I want someone to be able to develop both the idea of a Blues opinion / news blog and take it on from where I’ve tailed off from. As you can see from the archive it was once a busy, thriving site but it’s recently fallen into a state of Main Stand. I don’t want that for it since I’ve worked hard on it over the last 3 years or so.

So a couple of weeks ago, I offered the site – and all its content and extensions (forum, archive etc) to Kev, who currently administers the forum. He quickly enlisted the help of fellow admin Mike and now they plan to take the site onto the next level. I’m sure they’ll be posting their plans up soon enough and I’m sure there’s plenty of new features that will be added as well as current ones improved.

That’s all.

I hope you continue to enjoy the site under its new management.

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Points Over Performance?

November 27, 2008 by Aff · 2 Comments
Filed under: Polls 

As I’ve discussed in the blog over the last week or so, what’s the most important thing about watching your club? Is it winning or is it being entertained? Does it matter if the game is scrappy so long as Blues win? Answer in the poll on the right hand side now.

I’ve added four options, yes and no for those who go regularly and those who do not go. It’ll be interesting to see if there is a difference in opinion between regular attendees and those who cannot / do not attend regularly. Obviously I can’t cover every opinion in a poll so feel free to comment.

The previous poll saw just over 70 votes with 46% believing we’d finish in the playoffs, 24% believing we’d finish top, 22% believing we’d finish second and the remaining 8% believing we’d finish in mid-table.

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